This is Brian.
In my last post I gave the wrong mail address
the correct address is brian_rowland@hotmail.com

Thea's mothers (Nancy) address is naclough
Thea's father (larry) address is stamp@bookdream.com

I would like to thank everybody for their support.

Brian

My name is Brian Rowland, I have some sad news.

Sunday morning Thea was found dead in her apartment. She was found on the lying on the flour next to her desk. IT appears that she hit her head and landed in a position that did not allow her to breath.

If you would like more info you can email me at brian.rowland@hotmail.com or call 503-317-4405

Thea will be missed

I'm sure I've got something to say, but I'm not sure what it is. I've been writing more in my dead tree journal.

Tonight dinner is a Strawberry Fanta and a fairly traded dark chocolate bar with espresso beans. Just what I need in the evening... caffeine!

I got myself some new furniture. I got another bookshelf. If I counted right, I have six book cases in my tiny apartment. I think I have a problem with books. Plus I have two more bookcases at my parent's house. I think I am only going to move one of them.

Besides the bookshelf, I got a storage ottoman. It's nice to have a stable place to set my laptop. I haven't decided what to store in it, but I think I'm going to store computer parts in it.

And then I got the greatest thing. I got an adjustable drawing/drafting table with six small drawers. Right now it's covered with scrapbooking clutter. I did seven pages last night and I was working on a calendar today. I even got a new office chair to go with my new desk.

Spend, spend, spend!!!

We have a monthly Stitch-n-Bitch. This month I think it is at Michelle's and I hope to have it in my apartment next month. How hard could it be to clean a small apartment? Hahaha.

I've had an exciting week. I've been to the ER twice. Last Sunday I went for a migraine/sinus infection. I got IV fluids, a bunch of blood tests, a huge shot of morphine in my hip and antibiotics.

On Friday I was feeling like crap. I had a PCP appointment. He ordered a boat-load of blood tests and wanted me to check in with my pdoc. So I saw my pdoc, we just talked since all the blood tests had been run and we were just waiting for the results. (My PCP had ordered the tests to be run STAT.) My pdoc really wanted me to check myself into the psych ward but I pretty much refused. But I did agree to see her again on Monday. Later that evening she called me all in a tizzy. My lithium level was toxic. That's why I was feeling like crap. So back to the hospital with me for more IV fluids. They could only get a pediatric line in me because my veins are so small and hard to find. So it took an hour to get the 1000cc of fluid into me.

At this point I have track marks from all the IVs, blood tests and failed attempts to get needles and lines in me.

Oh yeah, my birthday was this week. I'm old, I'm 32. Thanks for the happy wishes!

I had a busy week, besides the time I spent in the hospital. Monday I saw my pdoc, Tuesday my dermatologist, Wednesday I had a pedicure, Thursday I had DBT and Friday I saw my PCP and pdoc.

The dermatologist was interesting. I have classic hormonal acne. Finally, I have something normal. She replaced my tetracycline with docicycline. And she gave me two creams, one for the morning and one for the evening. She wanted to give me another pill but it doesn't play nice with lithium, but I have a feeling I'm off the lithium permanently. I hope my pdoc gives me a replacement.

I've got a migraine. I woke up with it this morning. That was many, many hours ago. I tried to sleep it off. That was highly unsuccessful. I finally took some painkillers.

I just had a major thing-valanche. I think it's time to re-engineer my thing-stacks.

I have re-discovered podcasts. I played with them a bit when they were new but I was highly unimpressed. But now there are so many! I found a bunch of psychology and psychiatry ones.



P.S. Don't mind my spelling. I'm having trouble with my brain and my spell checker.

I miss my kitties. That is Sylvia Smudges in my icon. Brian says that it's been 18 months since I've seen them. :( I know it's been a while, but I didn't think it has been that long. They're not really my kitties anymore.

I'm very tired. Night-night.

Long time, no write. Sorry about that... I'd say I've been busy, but I haven't. Just Lazy.

I'm going camping with my parents and Molly-dog tomorrow. We're going to a camp ground in eastern Oregon that has a fenced dog park. And yes, the reason Mom choose this camp ground is only because of the fenced dog park. I still have to pack tonight.

Today I went out to lunch with a friend from the building and we did a bit of shopping and we went to my pdoc's office to get my med boxes refilled. I saw my records and I think they said I am bipolar. My pdoc never told me, although it is not a surprise. I'm going to try to remember to ask my pdoc next time I see her.

Maybe TMI... my boobies are perky today. I'm wearing an underwire bra instead of my usual selection of sports bras.

I've got an appointment with a dermatologist on the 9th. I've got horrid acne and I just realized it's been since I quit taking BCPs. I was on BCPs for fourteen years and I'm ready to let my body do it's own thing. I think it's been over a month since I've taken them and no red tide. I suppose I should see a gyn about getting my tubes tied... see if Medicare will pay for it.

I need to order some prescriptions from the pharmacy. Maybe I will remember tomorrow morning... or not.

The TV isn't amusing me tonight. Not even all the new shows. So I have the TV on, the radio is on and I'm surfing the internet. ADD much?

Okay, it's time for me to think about packing. Night-night all.

I've been sidelined. I went to Urgent Care to have my ankle looked at. I won a bunch of X-rays and an AirCast. I don't like the X-ray person. She made my lay on a cold, hard table and she bent my ankle in all sorts of ouchy positions. Mean lady!

My housekeeper came today. I have a sparkly clean apartment!

I fell and sprained my ankle/foot today. It hurts. I limp. My leg went numb and I tried walking on it before I got feeling back in it. I'm afraid of what happens when my neuropathy gets worse.


Please, no!


<3 thea

I had the beginning of a migraine earlier. I took "plenty" of painkillers. I feel much better now, but I'm typing in slow motion. I'm very relaxed.

I'm craving a skinny almond latte. Don't know why. I haven't had any coffee in forever.

I miss my kitties.

Must stay awake for a little bit longer to test my BG...

3:45AM. I suppose I ought to take some meds & head off to bed.

I got sick over the weekend. Today is my first day up and around. I actually took a shower and put on clothing. And I walked today... over 6,000 steps. My goal is 5,000. I cheated on my diet and walked to McDonalds... It was yummy and oh so bad for me. 98g of carbs and I had unsweetened tea to drink instead of soda.

I've succumbed to the pressure of my dietitian and started to count carbs. Grr. I need to get down to 180g per day, in evenly divided meals and snacks. So, I bought myself a small notebook (school supplies were on sale) and I've been writing down everything that I eat. I really need to get my blood glucose under control because my feet are getting worse. Right now they are aching and burning and tingling and I'm almost tempted to get my ass out of my recliner and get some pain killers. Almost. Hey, I'm lazy.

I've been bonding with my calorie and carb counting book, again. Fun stuff. I've been looking up random stuff to see how much I can eat. I saw a cool egg cooker at the store today. I can eat eggs. I also think I'm going back to drinking Ensure or Glucerna for breakfast. It's so much better than what I'm doing now. My first food today was a bottle of Pepsi at 1pm. Oops. Or I've got some protein shake mix... it's got to be better than Pepsi.

I missed out on going camping because I was sick. :( Mom said she'd take me another time. I love their RV. I use the bed above the cab and it is warm and cozy.

I go to therapy tomorrow. Whee. I have just enough money left to pay for therapy and have my housekeeper do one load of laundry. Usually I have her do two loads of laundry but I will only wash my sheets, shorts and tank tops. I have plenty of tee-shirts and towels and I can move a pile of empty boxes to get to my underwear reserve. Wow, I went from therapy to clean underwear, Freud would be proud.

I wonder how to use the camera on my laptop?!?

Hey, I figured it out. It's a program called Photo Booth. The lighting is a bit weird because I just have one lamp on. I'll have to try it in the daytime.

Hahaha. Look at my extra chin. If you look closely, you can see some of my piercings.

Speaking of holes in my head... A new tattoo shop opened just down the street from me. I don't need a tattoo right now, but I'm glad they don't do piercing because I would feel obligated to get a hole poked in something.

I hate SI. I did it again a couple of nights ago. I was hysterical. Unfortunatly it calmed me down better than any drug. I went from screaming to calm in less than five minutes.

Okay, I think that's all. What I lack in frequency in posting, I make up for in length.

<3 thea

I went to the doctor today. Last month my TSH was 5.1. Hypothyroid is a TSH is above 4.5 to 5.0. I had another thyroid panel done today. Yeah... not. It only took the guy two tries to get blood out of me. Anywho, if my TSH goes any higher, I get meds. Yeah... not.

There isn't a thing on TV tonight. I'm watching Miss Teen USA. The girls are just young things, 16 to 18 years old. They look so grown up. And they are so skinny, they haven't even muscles. Poor Miss Minnesota doesn't have a scrap of fat to keep her warm in the winter. And yet, what I wouldn't do to be tall and skinny...

I think I'm seeing my therapist again. I had an appointment with her today. My pdoc really wants me in therapy. Le sigh. I trust my pdoc, so off to therapy I go. I actually had a really good session today. The place I'm going has a 50% rate of cancelations. Oh my. I've only missed one session in the couple of months I've been going. Rashell was really happy with me.

I'm going to my parents' house tomorrow to do some cooking & baking. I have a recipe for a Bisquick cheese cake that requires a blender and a pie plate. I own neither. I'm also going to make a big batch of potato salad. Yummy.

We're going to the fair tomorrow. I haven't been to the fair in years. I love the bunny 'wabits. And the birds... and the elephant ears :o

After years of testing three to four times a year, I finally have hypothyroid. My pdoc saw my test results and wanted to know why I'm not on meds for it. Le sigh. I have to ask my PCP when I see him next week. That probably means more blood tests. Fun stuff. My veins are small and hard to find.

M'kay. I'm going to bed. I've got stuff to do tomorrow. G'night.

Hopefully this will work...


This is the picture of Molly that I look at when I miss doggy kisses.

I just woke up from several dreams. To preface, right before I fell asleep I was reading a diabetes magazine about the different kinds of insulin delivery devices. So I dreamt about all the different kinds of blood glucose meters, test strips and lancets. I was poking myself with every imaginable lancet device. I had bruises and poke marks everywhere. I think only someone with diabetes would get it.

Then you have to be a geek to get my second dream, it was more like a joke. A secretary heard that her new boss was going to use his computer for teleconferencing so she ordered him some old-fashion radio cable for voice and TV cable for picture. The flat kind with two wires, one on each side.

That's it. I'm not reading LJ until after I finish HP 7. I accidently came across some spoilers in a non-reading community. I don't know if they were real or what, but I'm not taking any chances. So if you want my attention, comment to a post. I'll still be checking my comments... unless someone sends me spoilers, then I will have to send a thousand llamas to potty on your lawn.

Oy. I bounced a couple of checks. Bad Thea! Now my checking account is $87 overdrawn. I, with some help, decided to just close my checking account. It's a huge relief to not have to worry how I'm going to pay the overdraft fees. Nevermind my credit rating...

It's hot here. It got up to 101F today. Bad for me, good for my tomato plant. I have three itty-bitty tomatoes. They should be ripe in another three weeks or so. Yummy!

I am getting so tan, at least for me. I'm outside walking places a lot. My toes are getting tan and the pink polish is looking better.

I have to walk to the pharmacy in the morning. It's about 15 blocks one-way. Thursday I have to ride the bus into Eugene. I have a shrink appointment and I have to get my med boxes refilled.

My G-d, I live a boring life. Today I got a haircut and played bingo. I had pasta for lunch and a banana and gatorade for dinner.

much later...

Is anyone else watching Big Brother? (I'm watching it, but I have Gwen Stefani playing.) Have you noticed how all of the house guests are thin and pretty? Not very representative of the world I live in. I live in a world of boobs, butts, and stomachs. (Don't you hate it when your tube top starts to slip?)

TV bugs me. But I can't look away. Just think of all the things I could accomplish if I didn't spend so much time watching TV.